As a resource person in my life time.

I may not call myself as a resource person rather I prefer to call myself as facilitator. I was being called by district education authority along with my colleagues to conduct Dzongkhag based In service Program (DBIP) for the first time in my life as a teacher. The program was scheduled from 1^st to 6^th of December 2015.

I neither welcomed the news of DBIP nor did I unwelcome it. I have mixed feelings over it. I was bit afraid and nervous for the first time as I am completely novice facilitator. At the same time I felt I was being called by a stroke of luck because I know that I am never fit to be resource person or facilitator. Never the less I was never handicapped; I had two young, dynamic and exuberant friends who can make our program lively and conducive.  

Finally the big day had approached. I displaced my blanket and waked up before the morning sunlight. I felt bit chilly as it was already winter in Gasa. I rushed towards the bathroom to prepare myself for the day. As I dressed up for the day, my heart was palpating with fear. No matter how much I tried to console myself, I could not boost up my self esteem. I could not enjoy the taste of my breakfast. I took only few spoons of rice and went towards RC campus where I am supposed to conduct the DBIP.  May be I suffered from anorexia on that day because on other days I eat like a bulimic person.

Exactly at 9: am we have arranged everything ready for the day. District Education Officer welcomed every one of us for the program. Though there was a pin drop silence in the hall my heart was beating even faster than before. I forgot everything that I prepared to speak. Nothing got strike in my subconscious mind. All I can remember today is my stammering words throughout session.